Avatar vs Halloween II: Land Of The Lost

I got these cheaply made wallets at a 99 cent store a few years back simply because the images on them amused me. And now I share them with you.



Do you remember that part in Avatar with Will Ferrell and Danny McBride? Me neither. It's probably because they weren't in it. I'll admit that I enjoyed Avatar, but do you think their inclusion would have made the movie better?



Then there's this masterpiece. Interesting font choices here. You may notice what appears to be Michael Myers wielding his kitchen knife in the bottom left corner of the image. So is this a face-off between James Cameron's Avatar and Rob Zombie's probably terrible (I only saw the first one. Malcolm McDowell and Brad Dourif couldn't even make that movie worth watching.) Halloween II? Or is this actually the second Avatar vs Halloween movie? If so, did the first one really do well enough to warrant a sequel?

I'm not really sure what the story is behind these, but Avatar, Halloween II, and Land Of The Lost all came out in 2009, so it's obvious to me that whoever was behind these wallets was trying to take advantage of what they hoped would be successful movies. At least one of them was a financial success. If you're into mashups of movies that no one cares about anymore, you might be able to still find these, but don't expect to actually use them as wallets. The first time I opened one of these to use it, the velcro ripped right out of it. It's pretty sad when your velcro is stronger than your stitching.

Bloody Dreddful

I was recently reading about filmmaker Danny Cannon, and I found something that completely baffled me.

When Cannon was a teenager, he entered a contest in the comic 2000 AD to design a poster for a possible Judge Dredd movie. Inspired by Blade Runner, his poster said it would be directed by Ridley Scott, have Harrison Ford playing Dredd, and have Daryl Hannah playing Anderson. I saw the poster itself, and I found it rather underwhelming. I was expecting to see a drawing or painting of Ford as Dredd. Someone who's good at art needs to make a new version of that poster. I can't because I suck at art. Anyway, I'm way more interested in the concept. It sounds like it would have made an awesome movie. Harrison Ford playing Dredd? I never say this, but... Shut up and take my money!

Now here's where it gets confusing. Cannon went on to direct the 1995 Judge Dredd movie starring Sylvester Stallone. Why didn't he try to make it like a Ridley Scott movie and cast Harrison Ford? How could the guy have that vision and then make that sub-par Stallone movie? I'm so confused. I'm guessing it was studio interference or something.

I was thinking about it, and honestly, that recent Dredd movie with Karl Urban sounds a lot more like Cannon's original concept to me. It's got Anderson, it has a Dredd who is probably about as intense as if Ford had played him, and it definitely has a Blade Runner feel to some extent. Now that I think about it, it seems to me like the people who made 2012's Dredd must have been like "Hey, remember that poster Danny Cannon made for that 2000 AD contest before he made that mediocre Dredd movie? Yeah, the poster was underwhelming, but wasn't the concept cool? Let's make our movie like a modern equivalent of that."

I feel like maybe this post makes me sound like a dick. If for some reason you actually read this, Danny, I'm sorry. I'm not trying to be mean. If it wasn't for you, maybe "Dredd Song" by The Cure wouldn't exist, and I like that song. Let's get FroYo sometime.